White, blue, black border - We have associated this color scheme with the Bavarian Motoren Werke for almost a century: But what made this configuration a legend? Click the play button to go Fly? back in time
We know the S1000RR is one fast mutha’, with 193hp on tap at 13,000RPM, 82.5 lb-ft of torque at 9,750 RPM, 455.3lbs on a full tank, these specs giving it the best power-to-weight ratio and most power of any literbike available in any showroom. With the aid of a trick traction control system [And ideal conditions, of course], it’s capable of 8 49 sprints at 158mph! Click the play button to see this rider go from one point of the strip to the other in seemingly cartoon roadrunner-like velocity.
“…this could happen anywhere in the world and not in specific areas.” I see the Motoren Werke’s linguistics department is hard at werke.
The K1300S obviously has a permanent place in my little black heart, but doesn’t really prove to have any phenomenal advantage over the famed Busa [Especially for how much wallet paper they're asking for]. Hey douche-narrator wearing Affliction, making irritating hand gestures: I agree with you sh*t, BMW’s odd unique Duolever front setup was the ultimately good choice for stability and comfort [partnered with a longer wheelbase], the Suzuki owns those knee-screeching tarmac.
“Mark Carson: Totally excited about his new BMW M6.”
What will complement Hawaii’s fastest-growing tree? BMW’s lengthily-prepared customer M car. Taking an excessive 365 days to concoct, Hawaii-native Carson’s Individual M-Coupe satisfies both the scenery of his commute and the pockets of the German car-maker’s marketing team. Included with a brief tour and rundown of Bimmer’s custom design program, is Carson’s mediocre, monotonous request of rare Koa wood garnishing the interior of his vehicle. Paired with Ontario Gold exterior paint finish, you got yourself a kickass promo video with tacky voiceover work. For the amount of drama that has been put into this monstrosity, I surely hope this “Totally exciting” canvas projekt gives Mr. Carson some “wood.” Insert hang ten hand gesture here.
You there, what would your Individual [and your subtitle] look like?
In most cases, applying lipstick to a pig only exacerbates the quips the swine receives; in this case, however, the lipstick applies like grade-A cosmetics on a Covergirl. Vorsteiner is the latest aftermarket tuner to get their grabby hands on BMW’s controversially-styled Cross-Coupe [In this case, with an M badge attached on the hatch lid]. The omni-carbon VRS Aero Package’s front splitter, 23″ Michelin-wrapped wheels, roof and decklid spoiler, 40% lighter bonnet and rear diffuser almost makes Bavaria’s disorienting crossover acceptable to automotive society.
Vorsteiner’s new lipstick will be available this summer.
BMW takes pride in what they do, how they do it, and what they accomplish. - The same spirit cannot be translated in their humbleness [For a good three minutes and fifty-one seconds, anyway]. A quick lesson on how to mutilate other luxury emblems with a felt-tip permanent marker: Slot them atop a reclining barcalounger to insinuate their desolate insipidity. Place them on a scale of justice to italicize the laws of perfect weight-distribution, preferably with an anvil on the bonnet and a kitchen sink on the boot. Breaking the fahrvergnügen credibility by disconnecting the four rings. Composing a doleful feline. Embedding them onto an opponent’s overpriced bill, complete with a halo above one of their own.
All of which accent the German car marque’s number one priority: “Building Machines For Driving Enjoyment.” Overlooking the whole “Canines can do mathematical equations” and “More shoe and pizza” quotient, BMW certainly defines the propeller emblem with the words “Dynamic,” “Innovative,” and “Independent.”
“No, we’re not done with Hydrogen.” States BMW over rumours that they have ceased their efforts on bringing a vehicle that combusts Hydrogen into ICE engines into the masses. So… Where are we? Are the peeps in white coats still working late nights in those clean, pressurized labs? [We haven't heard anything in a while guys] Or can we just skip all the hooplah and move on to the part where Hydrogen is moot point? Hmm? No infrastructure, no feasibility. Next.
How…gratuitous.
The demand might be there, but is there really a need for yet another over-priced, over-hyped gas-electric contraption that will only generate a paltry 18mpg? Bayerische Motoren Werke thinks so… And thought they did, astutely. Hybrid sales are up 11.4% year-on-year this October, while also grabbing a 2.9% market share. And of course, there are the cliche of flourescent-coloured velour jogging suit-wearing mothers out there pushing $1,200 baby strollers who just can’t wait to join the puffed up bandwagon.
But the question still remains… Do we need said gratuity? Are they any cleaner than their internal combustion counterparts? *Not* necessarily. More efficient? Definitely *Not*. Returns your investment? *Not* unless that investment were a couple rolls of quarters.
The German marque might indeed hit a near bulls eye with their sales targets, but will these vehicles ever be looked upon as a compulsory member of the automotive spectrum? The word *Not* comes to mind, once again [and many more times, I presume].
Now im just going to put it out there in the open right now… im FUCKING RAINMAN when it comes to refreshing the Nurburgring webcam (my email is open should you want to call me a loser, ill happily accept them)
It must be bimmer day in the Northern Loop this German afternoon because all I see are BMW 3-Series with M badges on it, loving it!
